Frustrated with the Children

I came home tonight from work and there were some chores that needed doing. I asked my son to come and do. Looking me straight in the eye and without any hesitation he said, "I don't think so, it doesn't fit into my schedule." He's 11. I told my youngest daughter to help; again without hesitation she said no, and then fussed for a moment. I am at my rope's end. It makes it so that I do not want to even be home anymore. My oldest, same thing. She got herself into some trouble and was given the dishes for the week. In three days she has done maybe one set of dishes. Our children know that if they wait long enough that we, the parents, will eventually do it. I am always amazed at the comments that their teachers give them. Their teachers have always said how wonderful they are and how helpful. When do we at home get to see this version of themselves. I have tried to be thankful for them acting so "wonderful" in public, but it is not working. My patience just about vanishes when I walk through the door. I am certainly beginning to understand to some degree why some Dads just walk out on the family. More often than not I seem to be at that point. I get so angry. I sometimes hope that when I die they will live with so much regret and sorrow for the way they treat their mother and I.
I am tired of being angry in my home and the constant disrespect that seems to ooze out them. I feel sad that I am at a point that I cannot wait for them to be out of the house. I do know that this will cause me to live with regret. I can't seem to get past it any more. I so much want to say, "I AM DONE!!!!!"
The only time they are fun to be around is when we do not ask them to do any chores or we are planning to go somewhere as a family. Even one of them finds some reason to complain. For instance, on Sunday night Jen and received some tickets to a spiritual event relating to Christmas. Both of our older daughters complained about having to go.
Yes they are teenagers, but I am still at my wits end.
I cannot wait to go on a vacation with just Jen. Even though they will save up all of the garbage they dish until we get home and coming home will be a nightmare. Scarier than any movie they could put in the theater.
I was hoping that this venting would help to feel better, but it is not.
Thanks anyway,

This Old Man